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Dropinceo > Blog > 2021 > November

When was the last time you contacted a colleague and let them know how well a connection they made for you went?

In a business environment so focused on the transactional aspect of networking, it’s easy to forget to nurture all of the relationships that produced the end result. If this sounds familiar, you have an opportunity to refocus your networking efforts on building these bridges to create a solid foundation for success. 

Gratitude networking is the art of paying it backwards to those who took the time to make introductions.

People who are gracious with their network do it because they truly care about you. When we come back to them and tell them the connection was valuable and how it was valuable, you solidify a trusting relationship for which they will remember you. When we forget these people in the process of gaining new business, we miss the opportunity for repeat referrals and burn bridges without realizing it.

I must admit, I did not realize how valuable networking was until the business development pipeline was drying up. What happened next as I navigated the labyrinth of networking organizations taught me a few lessons I want to share with you.

The lost art of the Thank You note

Remember to contact the person who referred you and share why the connection was (or was not) valuable. After I thanked a very gracious podcast host for their time to refer me to another host, the gift just kept giving. I must thank some of my best experts on The Drop In CEO podcast who have come from an abundance of referrals thereafter. Those guests soon became amazing referral partners and also reciprocated for an appearance on their podcast. Taking one minute of time to express gratitude has paid dividends in building brand equity and a trusting relationship. 

Write a review or recognize a colleague on social media

Content creators create for the love of creating. They don’t seek accolades, but when they receive them, it feeds their soul to continue the work. When we take the time to share with the world how they make you feel or consume their content, we serve humanity. Even more interesting is the side effect of recognizing our network is the impact on people that are watching you. You build trust with those you don’t even know yet because they see you expressing gratitude to your network. This increases the likelihood that they will engage with you in the future.

This week, I did a social media post recognizing someone’s book launch and podcast appearance on my show. That person’s network then generously downloaded my podcast and another reached out to me to be on the show. A five-minute social media post led to a bump in my network. 

Pick up the phone and tell someone how much you appreciate their support

As email and text convey information and emojis add an emotional dimension to communication, nothing replaces the joy of receiving a phone call and hearing the tone of your voice. Every time I have called someone and with my voice conveyed information, emotion and energy, I have 100% of the time received a response. This is especially important as it relates to completing a transaction. Every person that has been on my podcast has received a voice message or call from me expressing gratitude. Each and every time, they have come back with a thank you for my message. When we humanize our gratitude we leave a lasting impression. Just this month while vacationing in Florida, a past podcast guest referred me to a client to help solve a crisis. I later thanked the person who referred me and said I was always top of mind. 

As we move into the Thanksgiving Season where we express our gratitude for those in our immediate family and community, pause and reflect about who else you should reach out to. Don’t worry if too much time has passed. An expression of gratitude knows no boundaries. Make a list and when you return from your Thanksgiving holiday, remember to give thanks to those who want to see you succeed. 

If this makes sense, but you’d like to learn more about applying these principles to your situation, you can email medirect message me on linkedin or simply grab a few minutes on my calendar.  

I find through casual conversation leveraging The CEOs Compass often has all the answers for you to get back on track. 

The CEO’s Compass: Your Guide to Get Back on Track – If you’re that leader who feels in their gut something is off track, this could be the resource for you.

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Resources

Good Reads

The Game Changer’s Guide to Radical Success Paperback by Tevis Trower and an upcoming podcast guest on The Drop In CEO Podcast was an amazing resource for me.  Sometimes when we’re already successful, we can’t see what the next leap is for us. We stay in the present of what we’re good at, and with the insights from this book, you clear your mind to find what is your true calling and make a radical change towards success. 

Good Music

Loyalty Remains by Veigar Margeirsson As I finish my blog post while my copy editor patiently awaits to post this just before the thanksgiving holiday, I skurry to find an inspirational piece that conveys how I feel right now. While I’ve had some ups and downs this month emotionally, this piece renews hope that the work we’ve done together will come to fruition in 2022 and impact more people than I can imagine. Take a moment to listen and be emotionally uplifted by the end. 

Good Advice

My friend Clay Hicks podcast aired last week and as I think of our gratitude theme for this week, his quote was very appropriate. 

“We’re here to help each other right now. This is our moment. Let’s do that.”

–Clay Hicks

Listen and subscribe now: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/clay-hicks-finding-champions-of-your-brand/id1498953914?i=1000542447218

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“Deb, do you have a minute?”, my Manager of Food Safety asked.

I dropped my things on my desk after spending two hours that morning sorting email at home, only to find 20 new messages waiting for me.

I returned with my coffee, getting ready to call over my employee when the phone rings. It’s the VP of sales saying there’s an urgent issue with a customer and could I jump on a conference call in 30 minutes. Quickly, I rethink my morning and feel depleted because I was responding to urgent matters vs. what’s important.

This same “fire fighter” behavior is a common practice when handling business challenges and team relationships. We build relationships with our team in order to support them as they perform within the organization, but often push the maintenance of those relationships aside for more urgent matters.

We need to rethink our relationships and the time we allocate to each in order to get ahead in our work. Think about it, who should really be in an important relationship where we focus more of our time vs. those that we deal with on urgent matters. Wouldn’t a day be better spent with customers, working in partnership with sales or aligning with operations leaders to prepare our operations for regular customer or community visits? How many of you “wish” they could spend their day with these “Important” relationships vs. “Urgent” relationships?

Three important tips to change where you spend time in your relationships.

Identify “important” relationships

By identifying who you need to spend more time with and why the relationships are important, you have an outcome you are targeting. In The CEO’s Compass, I talk about Peace of Mind where if you spend more time with these important relationships, you will achieve the outcome you seek. For instance, spending more time with your customers because in the end being in partnership vs. reactive situations will ease the stress and you’ll realize a higher level of accomplishment.

Identify “urgent” relationships and how to remove yourself from them

Establish the framework and systems needed to triage urgent events and how they can be resolved without your involvement. Think about creating work standards where you give rules to your people to make decisions on their own and only the most important come to you.

Could these issues be grouped together for a weekly meeting and dealt with all at once vs. one by one? Have you delegated decision making to your team or given them additional responsibility to handle some of the urgent matters vs. the world being centered around yourself? Sometimes as companies grow in numbers, the leaders don’t know how to shed these urgent matters from their plate that can easily be managed by their people. The People, Process & Platform compass points in The CEO’s Compass give you the tools to elevate your people to handle “urgent” issues and giving you back the time to cultivate the “important” relationships.

Be a disciplined leader and spend 80% of your time on important relationships

‘You’ve got to be kidding’ you say to yourself when I espouse 80%. How is that possible? Well, it’s you that has to set the boundaries and block out your time to invest in the important relationships. It all starts with you. I discuss this in the first chapter of my book. The most important thing about making changes in your relationships is the one you make with yourself.

In full transparency, I struggled with this and it took time to move the needle from the urgent relationships filling my day to spending more time cultivating the important. During my last few years in corporate, I had the pleasure of spending more time visiting my customer locations as well as inviting them to our location for collaborative conversations.

Today, as The Drop in CEO, I invest in 80% of important relationships where I can now say I have Peace of Mind. The question to ask yourself is do you have the capability or capacity to find your way to the True North Compass point and feel the same way? If you need a guide, I can be that person for you… you don’t have to do this alone. Be the leader you need to be for yourself so that others can follow your lead and spend more time with Important vs. Urgent relationships. 

If this makes sense, but you’d like to learn more about applying these principles to your situation, you can email medirect message me on linkedin or simply grab a few minutes on my calendar.  

I find through casual conversation leveraging The CEOs Compass often has all the answers for you to get back on track. 

The CEO’s Compass: Your Guide to Get Back on Track – If you’re that leader who feels in their gut something is off track, this could be the resource for you.

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Resources

Good Reads

7 Keys to Navigating a Crisis by Dr. Elia Gourgouris PhD (Author), Konstantinos Apostolopoulos – I had the good fortune of interviewing Kon on The Drop in CEO Podcast and realized the book is about resiliency that transcends leadership through a crisis and also everyday life. An easy and impactful read. He has a Roadmap to Resilience 30 Day challenge beginning November 22nd that is an excellent accompaniment to this book. You can learn more about that here.

Good Music

Josh Kramer – Where the Light Goes This song is a little soulful and sad, but uplifting at the same time. Today, I’m a bit under the weather as I write this article and while I don’t feel optimal, I still find strength in this peace as empathetic to my condition. I wish you good health and keep positive energy to move you forward. 

Good Advice

 â€œIf you’re not standing on firm ground for yourself, you cannot give what you

don’t have.”

–Konstantinos Apostolopoulos

Listen and subscribe now:

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As a mid-career manager, I used to say “I wish I were a fly on the wall in the director meetings so I would know what is happening and why.” In those days, I was stuck in reactionary mode, my next move dependent on data handed to me from above. I felt helpless to influence the future. I was missing a “crystal ball”; a tool similar to The CEO’s Compass allowing me to influence and solve challenges in the workplace.

I haven’t figured out how to predict tomorrow’s winning lottery numbers, but I have figured out the secret to predicting future challenges in the workplace.

For this exercise, I will pull out my compass and explain how “Process”, “Past” and “Pride” are used at the same time to gain insight.

Observe the Process of team interactions and watch for power plays

Being an engineer, sometimes collecting data is the only way I can make sense of the world. I started taking notes on observing people’s interactions and writing down my predictions. Over time, I found that these predictions of the future increased in accuracy as I honed the process of data in an interaction and then an expected outcome was recorded.

Watch for these interactions to see changes in the environment and potential calls to action (CTA):

When someone goes into the boss’s office and then walks out with extra energy in their step – most likely they’ve been given new responsibility, a new assignment or a pending promotion. 

  • CTA: Engage with our boss that you’re open to new opportunities or challenges and why you should be considered. If one person is changing, there should be opportunities to engage with the new project or backfill openings that result from the change. 

When the boss is traveling extensively and you’re not sure what they’re doing, they’re potentially going through some strategic changes in the organization.

  • CTA: Engage with your boss in a proactive way such as: I want to be proactive about my career; what are some areas of the organization I should be learning more about in case there are changes and I need to navigate quickly in the organization. 

Watch for people that have started to miss deadlines, are periodically taking a day off more often than not or are disengaged from work and don’t seem to care. They’re most likely going to leave the organization.

  • CTA: If the person that is disengaging is in an area you’d like to have more responsibility; discuss with your boss your interest and willingness to expand your role. What can you do proactively now to learn more about a particular area. If you understand the gaps in the person’s performance, start sharing ideas to improve the person’s area of responsibility. You may be seen as the next go to resource to fill a gap. 

History repeats itself, so studying the “Past” gives you clues about the future and relationship power. 

Organizational Cultures are like the Titanic and are very slow to change, so study who got ahead in the organization and who can give you clues into being proactive about your future. To get ahead by merit alone is noble, but will slow down the process. Believe me, I know! Study the people that are steady & quiet workers or those who are loud – they always seem to get amazing opportunities and here’s why:

Watch the person that is steady & quiet and who they’re having lunch with or who they spend breaks with. They may have been working together for 5, 10, 20 years and have a long history of watching each other’s backs. One may have risen to a more senior role and is the advocate for the steady & quiet. 

  • CTA: Align with the leader that is advocating for others and form a relationship. This can be a shortcut to moving forward, but understand what they value and how you can help them. They may start watching your back and advocating for you

Watch the loud person and for sources of strength. Look at who they’re aligned with in conversation for enriching or supporting what they said. Look at who they’re speaking to before or after their meetings for their alignments. They have a strong message, but it’s reinforced by someone in the room.

  • CTA: Find your advocates. Presenting ideas is not good enough unless you’ve formed similar alliances with people that share your views. This is often done when you find someone who has shared values based on a similar past, building an alliance. When you show up to present a point, they have your back and your influence increases. 

When we pay respect to an individual’s â€œPride,” we build trust and champions of our causes. 

Ever wonder who that really smart person in the corner is who only speaks when spoken to? You wonder about their great wisdom akin to Yoda and how they got to be so smart and survive the numerous changes in the organization and remain untouchable. These individuals have gained power through protecting their knowledge or “pride” and only a few are privy to their world. When you need these people to help us with important projects, what can you do to gain their trust? 

Observe who they are aligned with and have quiet conversations that no one can hear. 

  • CTA: Schedule a 1-2-1 with the person you want to align with and take the time to learn about their many accomplishments and pay respect to their knowledge.
  • CTA: Seek to understand why they spend more time with certain individuals and if they were part of their past successes.
  • CTA: Ask for additional time to learn about their accomplishment in more detail and develop a bit of expertise in their area. This way you can advocate for them during a meeting as you have paid respect to their knowledge

When we pay respect to their “Pride” or area of expertise, they start watching out for you. They pull you aside and share information with you. It is up to you to determine if it’s relevant or are they trying to pull you astray or into their world of alliances.

Very often these people have been burned and are protective of their knowledge. They’re seeing if you will be aligned with them or not. It’s a delegate balance, but having these folks on your side can be mutually beneficial.

Now given all these compass points to understand the future and use relationships to gain insight and position, how do you apply all of this?

I stayed away from forecasting for many years, but later learned it was an essential skill not taught in school nor cultivated in your career, unless you had an advocate.

So if you don’t have an advocate, following some of these relationship building skills with the use of “Process,” “Past,” and “Pride” from The CEO’s Compass, you can use your own crystal ball to influence the future you want to have. 

If this makes sense, but you’d like to learn more about applying these principles to your situation, you can email medirect message me on linkedin or simply grab a few minutes on my calendar.  

I find through casual conversation leveraging The CEOs Compass often has all the answers for you to get back on track. 

The CEO’s Compass: Your Guide to Get Back on Track – If you’re that leader who feels in their gut something is off track, this could be the resource for you.

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Resources

Good Reads

The Long Game by Dorie Clark – finally finished this great work; I mentioned it over the past few weeks, but it came at a time where I’ve put in so much work into building my career and business. The strong message of quality & consistency and staying true to the strategy ultimately yields results. I so needed this read and recommend you read as well!

Good Music

Wake up, Moving on by Kevin Penkin – I was a little down this past week as not everything I had invested in was showing results. We need these moments of doubt to pause and reflect on how far we’ve come and how much closer we are to what we want to achieve. When we validate our convictions, you have a renewed sense of purpose and drive to continue forward. This song was light and refreshing and playful and lifted my spirits as I listened and pondered my future. I do hope you enjoy it. 

Good Advice

“If we just get a little bit better, we have a massive return on our overall success

and the success of our organization.”

–Mark Herschberg

Listen and subscribe now

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Imagine you’re heading into a company-wide meeting excited to share a new initiative with your team. You speak into a sea of faces and can feel the resistance in the room. Instead of sharing your excitement about new possibilities, your employees shake their heads. They can’t see past the overwhelm and promise of more work.

Some would say that this is a passion problem, filling roles with bodies rather than people who are passionate about the work they do. The truth is, it’s a leadership problem. When leaders come in lofty expectations, they fail to embrace the humanity (remember, humans still run the world) of our workforce. When this happens, the CEO’s compass is once again challenged with a changing environment, leading them off track from true North or Peace of Mind.

To navigate the complexity back to true North, three Compass Points give us the answers:

Leaders are sometimes off track, because they move away from their true Purpose, the northwest compass point. The purpose now sits in the wings while we implement the next greatest initiative, but they don’t validate it against the purpose and whether it makes sense or not. I recently interviewed Joseph James Slawek who spoke about “Wholesome Leadership” which is akin to “Purpose” and sought to get clearer on what he meant. 

There is not a lot written on Wholesome leadership and was fortunate to find this article that defined well what it means to be a wholesome leader. In the article Wholesome leadership and self mastery by Anu Wakhlu she writes leaders, irrespective of their industry, need to be:

  • good at creating a powerful vision,
  • inspiring people to follow that vision, 
  • thinking strategically through various business options, 
  • adding value through innovation, 
  • leading teams and people and most importantly, 
  • being in integrity and acting as role models for their teams.

I propose as a leader who is off track from “Purpose” to validate their work in the context of Wholesome Leadership to ensure it meets all those criteria when moving forward with new initiatives. 

The next compass point I would examine is that of Platforms, the southern point to ensure we have the right tools in place for leading people. In the context of ensuring Simplification, Lisa Bodell speaks about having the right metrics in place in her article: Planning to Simplify at Work? Do this first:

  • Decrease in number of approval layers required for a process
  • Employees appear less overwhelmed by their workload
  • Number of steps or layers removed from our product-development process

If your new initiative is making the lives of your people easier with the right measurements in place, they will support you and follow your leadership. 

Finally, the compass point of Process, the southeast point is often circumvented when we don’t engage in dialog with our people about the changes. The “eyeroll” or “heads down” gestures are indicators that they’re about to tune out to what is coming. Process speaks to the role of the leader to ensure the team has everything they need to succeed whether in time, resources or capability. When the leader pauses here to understand any concerns of the team and involves them in navigating the changes amidst the daily work, they become part of the solution and more willing to engage with the new initiatives. They do this because you approached them with humanity and you are seeking to give them the tools they need.

When you respect your people with Wholesome Leadership and give them the tools to Simplify their work, you will instantly elevate your leadership for a lasting impact. 

If this article resonated with you or you have a challenging situation, you can email medirect message me on linkedin or simply grab a few minutes on my calendar.  I find through casual conversation The CEOs Compass often has all the answers for you to get back on track. 

The CEO’s Compass: Your Guide to Get Back on Track – If you’re that leader who feels in their gut something is off track, this could be the resource for you.

No alt text provided for this image

Resources

Good Reads

Take Care of your People by Paul Sarvadi – I started this book during my book launch of The CEO’s Compass and noticed so many similarities between our two brands – take care of the people and they’ll take care of the business. I traveled to Florida this week for a little play and plan on finishing this great read. Make sure you get your copy!

Good Music

Trial by Warriors by Veigar Margeirsson….while sitting in Florida this week knowing I had to get myself in gear to write my weekly blog post, this song came up in my favorites. A highly uplifting piece from my “Epic” collection. I suggest you follow all of Veigar Margeirsson’s work if you’re looking for inspirational content. 

Good Advice

I feel honored to have captured Joe’s voice this week on my podcast; a leader who truly understands what it is to leave a  lasting legacy. He spoke at length about his insights and this quote from our conversation is a gem. 

“As a CEO, businesses run on trust, they don’t run on money.”

–Joe Slawek

Listen and subscribe now: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-drop-in-ceo/id1498953914

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