I can still see my mentee in front of me saying, “If I could only gain back my confidence, I can get the job done”. Their eyes were sad, their head was heavy and leaning on their hand and their shoulders were rolled forward. I was taken aback by this experience and the rest of our time together was spent finding the keys to gaining back their confidence.
How many people reading this feel the same way? We as a community need to realize the pockets of greatness in our ranks and seek to elevate them; simply as part of being part of the human race.
The causes for losing one’s confidence are numerous, but there is a common thread I see and it’s changing. As children we are fearless and climb, jump and run without fear. We tell stories of far off lands and see colors and shapes as far as the mind will take us. Then as we enter society and the systems seek to mold us into an approved form, we lose our creativity and some confidence along the way. For those that survive the conformity standards of society and continue to see bright colors and shapes are sometimes called out for being different. I’m sad to say that we continue to lose talent and shining stars through this process leaving people feeling unfulfilled and moving through life as a transaction.
While some will appear successful and be praised and elevated for delivering results these rockstars lose their confidence and fall to the wayside unfortunately. This happens time and time again when the leadership, teams or strategy of companies change and with that change comes a lack of confidence. What worked before no longer works and they see their work no longer having the impact of the past. I could go on and on how I’ve seen this pattern repeat. But as I turn this sad state of our society around, I want you to know that you have the power to change the situation.
When Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz was told she always had the power with her ruby slippers to return to Kansas, so do you have the power to change your situation and regain your confidence. And so did my mentee, who after working with them for 6 months, later emerged into their work environment as a rockstar. The unfortunate situation was that leadership wanted to maintain control as they started to be more visible. The environment got toxic and ultimately my mentee took back control, left the organization and is extremely confident in their new pursuits.
Here are a few key actions for reclaiming your confidence:
- Know your Strength & Passion and why you are valued
- Acknowledge the limiting beliefs, but release the narratives in your head as they no longer serve you
- Seek to understand the other people for their Strength & Passion and pay respect to them.
- Keep people informed about your work and engage stakeholders for support
- Learn how to message your ideas vs sharing information; there is a difference
- Continually seek feedback – it creates positive and actionable conversations
- Seek out advocates and mentors to help pull you along. Don’t do it alone
- Pause & Reflect – evaluate the impact of your actions and what you can change
There could be an hour of conversation on each of these topics, but all of these lessons are taught in my C-Suite Academy and more. I’m opening up my academy very soon and I want everyone who attends to know you can gain back your confidence. You can gain the tools you need to take control of your career and get the promotion or goals you deserve. Don’t let confidence stand in the way. When you can get it back, your results will be limitless.
For more information about C-Suite Academy (CSA) dedicated to the aspiring C-Suite leader, simply register to get on the waitlist, email me or connect with me for a quick chat. I can’t wait to help you be successful and reach your goals!
For more resources, you can listen to The Drop In CEO Podcast or check out my book The CEO’s Compass will help you get on track in days not months.
Resources
Good Reads
Strengths Based Leadership: Great Leaders, Teams, and Why People Follow by Tom Rath. It’s a classic, but as I started at my bookcase, I pulled this one to share with you. I remember reading it and taking the test to discover my strengths. It started to make sense to me when I realized I should not focus on what I was not good at. The results would be marginal at best. But leveraging my strengths would get me a lot farther. As an example, I’ve been told my voice and how I communicate is both calming and influential. So I spend more time writing, speaking and creating to inspire people. Find your strength and when you focus on that and let the world know, you will inspire others.
Good Music
I’m watching the sun rise at 7:28 a.m on 2/9 hoping I can get this copy to my editor in enough time to publish it today (thank you Amanda) and I see a beautiful sunrise with pinks and blues peaking through the branches outside my office window. It’s an uplifting piece of waking moments and slowly easing into a beautiful day. Enjoy!
Good Advice
“Make sure that everything that you’re doing on a day-to-day basis really feeds into that larger plan and that larger goal.”
–Eli Menczer