risk Archives | Dropinceo

Stop the Hustle! Why C-Suite leaders work smarter and get promoted faster

June 16, 2023

Did I just say that? Did I dispel every belief you had about working harder to get ahead? I’ve learned the hard way that you can only get promoted so far with your technical capability and hard work and then you hit a wall and then you get frustrated.

I’m even more frustrated when leaders in the C-Suite are not transparent about what to tell their staff why they cannot get ahead. Could it be you want to protect their resources? Or do they lack the skills to articulate feedback that will either help the employee or steer them in the right direction?

Well, today is a new day and I’d like to share with you my experience and a framework that can help you to work smarter and get promoted faster.

In a past role, I worked hard and I received 4 promotions in 7 years. That all came to an end when my advocate moved on and then I was stuck. I started shopping myself around within the company and no door would lead to where I wanted to go both career and financial. Instead I turned my energy outside and with that move to a new company, I was moved up again to 2 promotions in 4 years. This success happened by taking control of my career, networking with the right people and setting goals for myself. I soon learned that hustle doesn’t always work but the way you work will get you ahead faster.

So let’s turn to you: How do we turn this into a framework that can work for you?

5 Tips for working smarter, not harder towards your career goals

Advocates: are people who have your back and are always singing your praises. Lean into it, see how you can help, they are the ones that will promote or pull you ahead.
Messaging: It’s not what you say, but how you say it – I teach this information vs. messaging; an essential skill you need. Contact me if you want to learn more, I talk about this as one of the highest missing skills for up and coming leaders
Talking points – aka executive presence. What are the 3-5 things you believe in and are your core values? Have stories to demonstrate them and be ready to showcase them in an interview or presentation. When you lead with talking points, you create consistency in your messaging and you become a trusted resource.
Stakeholder management – when starting a project, know who the stakeholders are and make sure you have a relationship with them. Consider meeting regularly and when you have your next initiative, float it to them for their input so when you position it, they’ve already bought into your idea.
Build an external network that is intentional. I regret not having done this while working within a company. I had 800 LI connections when I started and now I have 7500 and growing. With more eyeballs on you and your experience, the greater that there will be pull vs. the constant push.

If you are aspiring to the C-Suite, and tired of the hustle, are you ready to change how you work and implement these tips?

If you are a business owner or C-Suite leader, are you ready to invest in your people and help them be successful? Their success is your success!

Now is the time for you to collect your thoughts and take action. I want you to succeed and this framework can enable you to do it yourself.

However, if you need more help, I’m here for you as the Drop In CEO, CEO whisperer or as a sounding board.

To hear more about my story about framework, please tune into my podcast that is releasing this Friday 6/16/23.

Maybe you simply need a support system to apply these new insights. I find leaders need a place to talk through the challenges and that’s why I created The Drop In CEO Collective, a forum for C-Suite leaders of today and tomorrow. To learn more about our next event you can visit our page and register.

Would you rather have a quick 1-2-1 to discuss your specific challenge? Could The Drop In CEO be your support system? Direct Message me on LI or contact me via my website and let’s have a conversation. Until then, I wish you much success.

How Setting Personal Boundaries can Lead to Success

June 11, 2023

I love working with CEO’s, C-Suite Leaders and leaders of tomorrow, because they’re so talented; but sometimes they hit a barrier and need my help. My heart hurts when I see them struggle and it validates the work I’m meant to do; to help them navigate challenges with confidence. One trend I have noticed is their inability to set personal boundaries to ensure their success.

For me, as you can see I’m a prolific content creator and I produce 1 guest and 1 solo episode a month. However, I have some vacation time and a few client projects that need to get done and I can’t also be doing my usual networking and podcasting through the summer. So I’ve built an inventory of interviews and closed down my calendar for a month in June /July when I won’t be recording. I’ve also limited my calendar to allow only a few networking meetings. Setting boundaries gives me some breathing room to not feel stressed, manage my client work and also enjoy my summer. Setting boundaries feels uncomfortable to me at times, but at the same time, I have a sense of calm and peace of mind that I’m in control

How do we turn this into a framework that can work for you?

Inventory the things that can be delayed / don’t have to be done for the next month or reduce the number of activities.
Set your schedule when you will start work, end work and force yourself to shut down your computer. For me, I start early, but I have my schedule such that most days I am done at 5. I close my laptop and know I’ve run out of energy to be most effective. I discipline myself to stop and know I’ll have twice as much energy the next morning to get those things done.
Time block when you will do administrative work, interactive work with colleagues/meetings, creative time – I know this is not always possible, but unless you plan your work, how will you ever get to a point where you feel like you’re in control?
If urgent matters come your way – pause and assess (delay) how urgent it is, or could it be delayed a few hours until you finish your creative or collaborative work uninterrupted. Sometimes people simply want to be acknowledged and know they will get your undivided attention when you are ready.
Take 20 minutes at whatever point in the day you feel like you start to wander and get off track. I’ve taken a late lunch between 2-3 and sat outside for 20 minutes. It’s very calming to my nerves. I told you I’m in personal wellness and when I go, go, go, my heart rate remains in the 70’s all day. When I pause for 20 minutes it goes back down into the high 50’s and it’s almost like I’ve had a nap. I come back to my work and the batteries are charged. 20 minutes for yourself won’t negatively impact your day. Go now, and take 20 for yourself!

By the way, I’m not perfect! I’m continually honing this skill. If I fall off the wagon I realize that tomorrow’s another day to be successful and learn how to set boundaries.

So there you have it! It’s not a difficult concept, but sometimes difficult for leaders to enforce self discipline. People are watching your behaviors. Failure to change will have a ripple effect in your organization leaving everyone stressed and in less than optimal health.

Now is the time for you to collect your thoughts and take action. I want you to succeed and this framework can enable you to do it yourself.

However, if you need more help, I’m here for you as the Drop In CEO, CEO whisperer or as a sounding board.

To hear more about my story about framework, please tune into my podcast that is releasing this Friday 6/8/23.

How Mitigating Risk Showcases Your C-Suite Leadership

May 10, 2023

The worst time to mitigate a crisis is when you’re in the middle of one. Leaders think their greatest purpose is to rush into battle with their teams to work tirelessly at all costs and celebrate surviving another day. While those leaders seem like heroes that live in the glory of their team seeing them as a great leader, I challenge you to rethink what true C-Suite leadership should be. It is the patient leader who discusses risk everyday and collaborates with their team to identify ways to reduce risk as part of daily work that should be the leaders worth following. When we have the time to methodically identify, qualify, prioritize and set a course for action during a time of calm will assure the business can respond responsibly to a crisis vs. react and be part of the crisis.

Having been caught off guard during a crisis in a past role, all I could do was organize my team to react based on predefined protocols. We followed the protocols and came out of them with a few battle scars. And I wondered, how could this have happened despite what we thought were all the controls to avoid a crisis. We only were able to detect and then seek to contain. Given my overwhelming exhaustion from such an experience, I later found a better way and I have to say the ISO 9001 Standard for quality management systems provided me guidance on how to be a proactive leader vs. a reactive one.

The new version of the standard which came out in 2015 was rooted in Risk Based Thinking and how to identify risks in all areas of the business both internally and external factors that opened my eyes up on a better way of leadership. Combining this with my Continuous Improvement Methodology, I developed a best practice for Mitigating risk in your business. The ISO auditor when we showed the approach was astonished at our approach and had nothing more to offer except validating it was a best practice and the company truly understood what it meant to manage risk.

I have the template to share with you if you want and I’d be happy to go through it with you if you think it will help your organization. Connect with me and let’s have a conversation.

If you would like to do it yourself, here is the framework:

Invite every functional area to the conversation: Sales, Operations, Finance, IT, Regulatory, Quality, Supply Chain, HR, Security. You would be surprised how many risks can be identified no matter how obscure.
Identify the risks – short term and anything that could happen in a 2-5 year horizon
Categorize them into people, process, platforms, regulatory, compliance, safety – any category that makes sense to your business. It enables what will be an overwhelming list to sort and manage different workstreams and simplify the work.
Rank them based on Severity & Occurrence. This is typically done on a scale of 1-10, but can be as simply as High, Medium and Low. A bonus would be a ranking of Detection which is the ability of your systems to detect the issue before it becomes a crisis. You can have a super high risk, but if you have an extraordinary detection system, the risk can be mitigated. Finally multiply all three numbers to get a final score; often referred to as RPN or Risk Priority Number.
Sort the priorities – you can do the entire list or do it within the individual categories. This reduces the overwhelm and helps the team to focus on the critical few and plan for lower priorities in the future
Take action – including assigning an specific action, assign an owner, due date and status.
Re-evaluate on a quarterly or semi-annual basis. This is a living document that should regularly be reviewed to assure we are mitigating risk and add new ones as they arise.

So there you have it: Invite, Identify, Categorize, Rank, Sort, Action, Re-evaluate. Sounds simple? It can be, but I’m right here for you if you need help to implement this.

On a personal note: I hate surprises and managing through a crisis. I do it very well and that is why companies pull me for that support. However, out of that dislike for managing a crisis, I find the best work I can do is to help leaders like you to mitigate a crisis. It’s hard work to sit down and do this work, but most rewarding and ultimately can lead you to a place of Excitement, Optimism as well as saving a lot of time in the future. Doesn’t this sound like the leader you want to be? If you’ve got this, but know someone who is struggling, could this framework help them? Pass it along if you think someone would benefit from this framework of if my support will help another leader mitigate a crisis.

Now is the time for you to collect your thoughts and take action.

To hear more about my story about How to create emotional consistency as a leader, please tune into my podcast that is releasing this Friday 5/12/23.

Maybe you simply need a support system to apply these new insights. I find leaders simply need a place to talk through the challenges and that’s why I created The Drop In CEO Collective, a forum for C-Suite leader support. To learn more about our next event on 5/15/23, you can visit our page and register.

What CEO’s can learn from the play “Annie”

February 8, 2023

I’ve shared with many of you I’m working with a Functional Wellness Coach to ensure my health is in check so I can continue to be in service to you. During this journey, we’ve discovered Stress has potentially cause my chemistry to be out of balance. As part of decreasing stress, I’ve been doing more things that give me pleasure and are relaxing; one of which is continuing to go to the theater. Last evening we saw the play “Annie” and while it was a feel good story, there are important messages CEO’s can learn to get better results.

First and foremost, the song “The Sun Will Come Up Tomorrow”, gives hope that you always have another day to make things right or to enjoy success and life. So many CEO’s dwell in what is going wrong vs. playing to what is going well and applying more energy. Where things are going wrong, they spend too much time in the weeds, vs. enabling teams to solve their own issues and inspire optimism. Fast Companies article about how CEO’s can lead with optimism in uncertain times is critical to enable high performing teams to meet those challenges.

While I could gush about the entire musical score for Annie, let me share my personal thoughts. I was once a victim to circumstances and I simply wanted to “survive” until tomorrow. The turning point came when I realized I had no more energy to survive and wonder how I got to this place. I focused on the immediate vs. the future. I had my hands in most everything vs. improving my decision logic and prioritization. I worked harder vs. smarter and knew no other way. Where was my boss? Where was the coaching I needed to develop the essential skills vs. applying resources at the issues?

I am so grateful I can now see clearly these challenges are common to most C-Suite leaders and those seeking to get into the C-Suite. No where do I find a systemic approach within corporations to identify these gaps in skills nor a program to evolve them. Only a lucky few have a mentor or a coach with others falling into despair or feeling stuck. Given this insight, I have curated these gaps into The CEO’s Compass as a guide to stop and recognize the gaps and start helping leaders develop new skills & approaches to their leadership style. This is a DIY guide to get back on track, but I can also support you and your business challenges often moving you from crisis to stability in 90 days or less. Let’s have a conversation.

If this is you, PLEASE do not continue as you have. PLEASE do start to do something different. If you are trying to get into the C-Suite, consider my book as a resource to get you on track in days vs. months. I also propose the Drop In CEO Collective that could jump start you to the right track in 50 minutes or less. Time is valuable and leveraging tools to give you back time and reduce stress is an investment in yourself that you should consider. We all want to see The Sun Will Come Up Tomorrow!

Message me if you’re interested in the Drop In Collective or click here for your exclusive invite.

Let me know; I’d love to support you.

Until then, I wish you much success-Deb

December 8, 2022

How fixing a light bulb can solve world peace… or close to it!

I don’t often talk about my husband Dan, but he’s the center of today’s story! He’s been my partner for over 33 years and while marriage is a challenge, we find a way to make it work. He knows having the house functioning well is the key to my happiness and hence Coviello World Peace! Read on because there is always a life lesson in everything I write!

“Honey, the kitchen light is out over the island, can you fix it?”. “Dan, the front spot light went out in front of the house, can you fix it?”. “Hey, when you have a minute, can you replace the light in my pantry?”. These requests to help give me light is actually a laughing matter for us as some lights are always blowing out in the house! While he could let the honey-do’s pile up and usually there is no safety issue or urgency to any light replacement, he knows over time it builds up my frustration. And so goes the saying: “Happy wife, happy life!”. Sound familiar? Dan knows that while fixing a light is only a small act of kindness and sometimes necessary, he also knows in the bigger picture, life will be more peaceful if he tends to these small requests.

Now I said there is a life lesson in all of this silly little story about how my marriage works, but hang tight as I finish the rest of the story. When Dan fixes the light over the kitchen island, it enables me to cook for the family and read the recipes without reverting to cheater glasses! When Dan fixes the spotlight on our home, it adds to my joy of seeing our beautiful home properly lit up. When Dan fixes the pantry light, I can see my inventory and more efficiently make meals for my family. It’s all about creating community and the things that give us pleasure in our lives. When Dan tends to the small things, the rest of our life is peaceful (most of the time!).

So what does this have to do with you? As always, I revert to my purpose of helping C-Suite leaders of today and tomorrow navigate challenges with confidence. And why is this important? Because I want you to struggle less and enjoy the things you like to do with yourself, friends, family and community. Simple and straight forward. I now ask if you are taking care of the little things that you need to improve your confidence, capacity or capability? Of have you delayed that in favor of urgent matters and procrastinate on serving the most important person; yourself. Sure, you can delay building up your skills, but for how long? Letting it slide too long may result in a poor performance review, missed opportunities or not being respected for the value you bring? And then, peace evades you.

If you know me personally, I’m not a Debbie downer at all. I’m an optimist and everyone of you that I’ve personally met, I’ve seen the value in who you are and potential for much more. I try to inspire you to think differently at every moment and take control of your situation. Getting a good review, raise or promotion is always good, but ultimately you want peace of mind in all aspects of your life. Just like changing a light bulb and keeping the home in good order; you deserve the same. Why not invest in yourself like my husband Dan takes care of the light bulbs?!

Thank you for reaching the bottom of my article! Can I be of more service to you?

If you just want to connect with me and see how I can support you in a business or personal setback, let’s have a conversation.
If you’re interested in learning more about Curling, my Podcast, my book , my blog or general information about my resources, click on each of the links to learn more.

Is Technology an Asset or a Detriment to Your Team?

July 22, 2022

When I see my daughter texting her friends, I would often say, “why not pick up the phone?” To that question, she would share with me it’s a group chat and far more efficient to organize their evening plans. Who can argue that technology can be an asset to help with productivity and communication? However, when I reflect on workplace culture and breakdowns in communication such as “I sent you an email,” or “they haven’t responded yet to me in Slack,” I wonder if technology is an asset or detriment to progress and efficiency?

Recently, I stopped doing Zoom video calls for my networking; deferring to a lesser form of communication; the ancient telephone! I find by eliminating the visual distraction, I can more deeply focus on the words and intonation of the words exchanged to deeply understand the person and try to connect with them. My advice to you is to consider this old school way of communication.

On a side note, if you are one of the many that I’ve recently spoken to by phone about your career journey, both opportunities & challenges, I can’t wait to bring your insights into my podcast and my “C-Suite Moments” as we kick off each episode!

…and now back to another story:

In my last corporate job, I remember receiving emails from the sales team about how frustrated our customers were about quality and also the lack of responsiveness from the plant managers to their concerns. To that, I would pick up the phone, address their concerns and proceed with setting up a regular 1-2-1 schedule to build a collaborative relationship. They were sincerely appreciative of my approach as others would hide behind emails and texts rather than to confront adversity head on and resolve issues in real time.

Don’t get me wrong, technology is a time savings and highly effective in a culture where the team already has a high performing work ethic. But for teams that have not established trust and respect for one another technology, in my opinion, will be the demise of the community and result in more inefficiency.

If this sounds familiar and would you like to change the trend, here are a few suggestions:

Be the change you want to see in others. Others will model your behavior. Stop with the technology and meet face-to-face or pick up the phone. If your colleague is in another country, WhatsApp is a great tool to also converse.
Use the rule of three. If there are more than three electronic exchanges (email, text, slack, chat) and the issue is not resolved or clear, meet face-to-face or pick up the phone!
Conquer confrontation. If you’re afraid to confront a difficult person for which technology has been a buffer to adversity, meet face to face or pick up the phone. At times like this, there is no better time to learn new skills to close gaps in understanding or reaching goals. My Drop In C-Suite Academy & 1-2-1 Coaching help you to manage challenging topics such as this.

When technology is doing more harm than good, resulting in inefficiencies and creating more division, it’s time to stop with technology and find ways of connecting with humanity.

If you need more convincing, Business Insider shares additional insights about 9 Subtle Ways Technology is Making Humanity Worse. I also discuss in almost every chapter of The CEO’s Compass: that human connectivity and development is at the core of every change you need to get back on track. I’ve learned that once you build connections with people, then the use of technology can be an asset to exponentially create value. This too, can be evolved with support of a guide through my leadership and competency development offers.

My wish is for every C-Suite Leader of today and tomorrow to navigate their careers with confidence. If this insight was helpful, share this article with others. If you have a unique challenge and wish to have a complementary conversation, please reach out to me.

Your time is valuable, so I wanted to share a few quick links so I can be of service:

P.S. C-Suite Academy enrollment is now open. This experience starts August 22nd, but enrollment ends August 15th. Message me for more information.

How to Prevent a Crisis with 7 Principles of the CEO’s Compass

June 15, 2022

According to Pricewaterhouse Cooper (PwC) 2021 Global Crisis Survey, 62% of businesses used their crisis plan in response to the pandemic and 95% of the businesses reported their crisis management plans needed to be improved. Is Crisis Management a compliance activity neatly tucked in the corner until you need it or an integrated conversation into our daily / weekly / monthly operational conversations? Based on that 95% statistic, I think it’s time to wake up leadership to the harsh reality that their job is not done until they apply the 7 Principles of The CEO’s Compass.

When I’ve dropped into Crisis events over the last 20 years, I have found a common theme amongst leaders. They have a false sense of calm because they can check the box on their compliance activities. They’re getting results (most of the time) and their team is loyal (or perhaps complacent). This calm before the storm is common and those that don’t respond quickly to a changing landscape (loss of a leader, changing customer requirements, changing customer perception), they find themselves moving down the Crisis Scale from being in Control, down to Chaos and finally Crisis. When I’m finally called into bring things back into Control and move them up the scale to Continuous Improvement and further into a Competitive Advantage, The CEO’s Compass provides you the direction of where you’re off track and how to make course corrections:

Framework of The CEO’s Compass to Navigate to Peace of Mind

Purpose – test the landscape and ask if people understand the purpose of the company in the context of their job function. This is an indicator that cascaded communications are effective
Performance – no longer the lagging indicator of results (quality, service, safety, sales), but leading indicators of closing the capacity, capability & confidence gaps of your team to meet the purpose of the company.
Past – if you or your direct leadership team cannot articulate the deep culture that each individual brings to the table, go find out now. In doing so, you pay respect to the individual and their unique qualities that made them special and the right to be part of the organization
Pride – building on understanding one’s past and their culture, you need to go the extra mile and understand their unique gifts and intellectual property they have. Whether you use them or not, by asking the question, you pay respect to the individual, they tend to be more loyal and you never know when you may need to leverage those gifts. Leaders that skip Past & Pride simply have a transactional workforce and they leave their minds & hearts at the door to your business.
People – developing the mindset & skills of your people fall on you to remove any barriers to enable them to reach their full potential. Ensure you have a robust program that starts with strategic investment in your people through 1-2-1’s and capability development.
Process – the dynamic between individuals and functional groups is as important as people development. Without coaching team dynamics and leveraging each other’s skills, you will fall victim to wasted time and lost revenue due to process inefficiencies.
Platform – a leader who has an evolving team and moving towards high performance needs to provide them with tools to assure they can maintain high performance. Often tools that enable good decision logic, prioritization and accountability are critical when your people are taking on more work and need to increase their efficiency & effectiveness else they’ll burnout. 77% of people surveyed in a Deloitte survey say they’ve experienced burnout.

I can assure you that most leaders are off track on 2-3 of these guiding principles to prevent a crisis. There is nothing in here about a crisis, communication or risk mitigation plan as typically developed by your Crisis Management Officer. If you’ve not shored up the compass, you become the 95% statistic of the company not being prepared and needing to make improvements. For the team that is navigating towards Peace of Mind, the 8th compass point, the Crisis is the opportunity for which their fullest potential will be realized.

If this insight was helpful, share this article with others. If you have a unique challenge and wish to have a complementary conversation, please reach out to me. I love helping C-Suite leaders of today and tomorrow reach their career goals.

Your time is valuable, so I wanted to share a few quick links so I can be of service. Click the link if you’ve been thinking:

The C-Suite Academy: How to Decide if a New Job is Right for You

March 4, 2022

Several of my students have asked me: “How do I decide if a job or opportunity is right for me?” A few years ago, I struggled with the same issue. I’ve made decisions and later found the job was not right and it quickly came to an end. Later in my career, I was more grounded and made better decisions for which I’m grateful. The process of choosing a new job or approaching any big decision can be heavy with emotion and fear of the future.

You start with the emotional roller coaster. You wonder if you can fulfill the role? You’re excited to share the prospect with others. And then a little thing starts showing up inside of you. You have a sinking feeling in your gut. You try to rationalize these feelings whether good or bad. They can even bring you tears of joy because it’s everything you’ve ever wanted and you feel like you arrived. But in the end you find yourself festering over the details and sometimes paralyzed to make a decision. Emotions wear off and now you’re left with needing better decision making skills.

Values, Needs & Purpose Framework:

When making decisions, I find it easiest to ground myself in the following:

My values – family, rest, service, home cooked meals, community

My needs – financial, health, location, retirement, close to family

My purpose – greater calling or what feeds your soul

It’s important to use this framework and create your own metrics for decision-making – be it a new role or and everyday challenge.

But how do you weigh your choices against this framework? It would be ideal if the choice or opportunity fit all three – values, needs and purpose. When aligned, it’s a green light all the way.

What if your opportunity only checks the box on two of the three? Could you live with it for the short term knowing it satisfies your values, needs or passion in the long term. Then, you might go for it.

I was once faced with a job offer where my values & needs were checked, but not my purpose. I struggled with it, but then I took the high road and said, it was a means to the end in achieving my purpose. – then I can live with the decision. That role led me to my dream job 2 years later.

But what if the role fulfills your needs such as financial, health, location, but it would require violating your values of rest, home cooked meals and it did not fulfill your greater purpose. You could take the role and be successful, but chances are it’s not sustainable.

So if you can’t check the box in all three, for the one you cannot, ask yourself how long are you willing to do without and if only a month, then pass on the opportunity. If you can pause for 2 years, then okay as long as you have a plan to do the work to fill your soul.

This work cannot be done quickly. A disciplined leader has to do a few things in order to move through this:

Pause & reflect – what are you feeling and acknowledge the energy? It’s important because the chemistry between what you’re feeling in your gut, in your heart and your mind are on high alert and you need to acknowledge it. Your body knows when you’re on the precipice of something new. The body needs some time to equilibrate to recognize this is a place of growth and refining your guiding principles for making a decision.

Look at the framework of Values, Needs and Purpose. If you can check the box on 2/3, you’re in a good place as long as you have a plan to fulfill 1/3 down the road.

If you’re only at 1/3, then evaluate how long you can live in that state of imbalance and if less than 6 months, it may not be right and go in a different direction.

Using the Framework to Make a Leadership Decision

Think of your situation.

Can you apply the approach of what are your values, needs and purpose and use that to help you make a decision on a new role or position?

By following this framework you respect the weight of the decisions you’re making while building new leadership skills for future decisions.

For example, the next time you need to hire a team member you can ask yourself the three important questions regarding value, needs, and purpose. Do they have the same values and needs that the business has? Do they express a greater purpose for which they can grow with the organization?

If this makes sense and this insight can be valuable to you and others, I’d love to have a conversation to help you or the communities you serve. I can share my insights through a webinar or speak in person. I can share with you The CEO’s Compass, my book that has many of these insights for C-Suites and Aspiring C-Suites. I also offer you my C-Suite Academy that is to serve the Aspiring C-Suite who wants to take control of their career and get promoted. I’m here to help you achieve your goals.

For more information about C-Suite Academy (CSA) dedicated to the aspiring C-Suite leader, simply register to get on the waitlist, email me or connect with me for a quick chat. I can’t wait to help you be successful and reach your goals!

For more resources, you can listen to The Drop In CEO Podcast or check out my book The CEO’s Compass will help you get on track in days not months.

Resources

Good Reads

This week, I did not have time to read something new. I’m in a place where I’m managing multiple accounts and instead of filling my mind with new insights I decided to give my mind some rest. Sometimes when you rest, more creativity comes through vs. filling it up with new information. Rest is good I keep telling myself and it may be what you need right now for clarity and decision making.

Good Music

NIGHT Part One: Snow – Solo Pianist George Winston – from DECEMBER

George Winston is an artist I discovered many years ago who’s pieces mirror the seasons of the earth, but also parallel seasons of change and decision making. In this piece, it feels like your heart and mind racing which is what you may face with a difficult decision. Discover this artist as it may speak to your soul.

Good Advice

“Most of the issues that we are experiencing throughout our lives are based on that dysfunctional disconnection between emotions and feelings.”

–Dr. Kinga Mnich

Listen and subscribe now:

C-Suite Academy: Winning over difficult people

February 27, 2022

I remember having a 1-2-1 with my boss and feeling proud of how well I prepared for that meeting. I knew I was going in with concrete topics I wanted to discuss and solutions to each for a good conversation and enrichment. To my surprise, they said they appreciate my ideas, but told me to only focus on the short term projects and not the long term ones that could make a significant impact. I left the meeting deflated and questioned if I was in the right role or was I doing the right job. I thought my boss was a bit harsh and I couldn’t understand it. I wanted to react, but instead I simply responded with compliance to his request and left the meeting unfulfilled.

Have you ever felt that way after a meeting? Knowing this can be a challenge for many, I wanted to provide you some insight in how to win over difficult people.

Check your mindset before evolving new skills to manage difficult people.

The first thing we must do is to check in on yourself and your mindset when it comes to who you “perceive” as being difficult. I suggest you think about a particular situation you’ve encountered and these themes about being perceived as difficult:

It’s a gap between your standard of behavior and theirs
If you were having a bad day, would you want others to judge you in that moment as the way you are all the time and with everyone?
Could there be a reason why they behave that way that is embraced culturally? It may simply be not acceptable in the culture you are familiar with

What does it mean to be perceived as difficult?

Let’s also ground ourselves in what it means to be difficult because these are the items that can trigger you to “react” vs. “respond” and control your interaction with that person.

People are perceived as difficult when:

Micromanaging your work
Come across short – you interpret them as being condescending
Publicly humiliate you
Chastise you for sending an email or reaching out to a person in the organization
Nit picking about insignificant details in a presentation

So now that we’ve qualified the gap you see in the people and the scenarios for which they show up as difficult, what are some tools you can employ to win over difficult people?

Employ a Framework that assumes the person is good and means well

Starting from a place of assuming the person is just like you and has good intentions. Also know there could be external influences on this person that cause them to behave in a way that could be “survival” in the culture they reside. You can go in with this approach that could improve the outcome of a 1-2-1 with them:

Gratitude – thank them for their time, guidance, or feedback. Relate it to a recent issue
Acknowledge them – sometimes these individuals are seeking attention and being “loud” or imparting their views is a way that speaks to their value or higher needs. They may not be getting acknowledged by their peers or those higher in leadership.
Discuss the Gap between standards or expectations – this could be behavior, culture or ways of working. Be clear to show your view vs. your bosses view and gain consensus on the gap. Ask probing questions about their view on the gap and ways to close them. Again, it could be they don’t have good skills in communicating gap, so it come across as “difficult”

Try this on a colleague before you try this on the person you perceive as difficult. Once you have the confidence, go in strong expecting the best. The good news is you may come to a higher level of understanding about the person and then you no longer see them as difficult. The even better news is if the person continues their behavior, you’ve at least developed a new skill in having a constructive conversation and you responded with control. This skill can be taken to all parts of your career and personal life.

So what happened to me and the person I perceived as difficult? I practiced this framework and they no longer picked apart my work. I was gracious to their needs and keep them informed of the work I was doing. They continued to communicate their support for the work I was doing and kindly provided feedback in a way that was constructive vs. destructive in the past. Who knows, I may have taught the other person new ways to communicate!

Sounds easy? Maybe it is easy, but hard to develop the new skills on your own.? My C-Suite Academy contains content like this and so much more that will help you take control of your career.

For more resources, you can listen to The Drop In CEO Podcast or check out my book The CEO’s Compass will help you get on track in days not months.